Hipster

When I was in middle school, I got teased for being fat.  A LOT. 
“You are NOT fat!” my mother insisted when I cried about being teased (middle schoolers are assholes).  “Those other girls are just jealous because you’re more developed than they are!”
I laughed bitterly, scornfully, and otherwise adverbially at her.  To me, “more developed” [...]

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Short, Brutal, and to the Point

Robin McKinley, The Door in the Hedge
I really hate to admit this, but the more I read McKinley’s work, the less I like it.  I really enjoyed her stuff when I was a child, and I actually just picked up some good used copies of The Hero and the Crown and The Blue Sword.  But [...]

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In Which I Dismiss An Author’s Entire Body of Work

I believe I’ve mentioned before that when I like something, I really like it.  Seriously.  When I got the first season of Veronica Mars on DVD, I watched the whole box set in less than 18 hours.  I AM THAT OBSESSIVE, YO.
And not above hitting the fast-forward button, either.
So anyway, regular readers may remember that [...]

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I Am Frivolous

Steve Almond, Candyfreak
Man loves candy.  Man eats candy.  Man tours candy factories so that he can score free candy.
Okay, there was also some stuff about how the Big Three candy conglomerates are pushing everyone else out of business.  And a lot of mostly unanalyzed whingeing about Almond’s childhood and his depression.  Seriously.  I have no [...]

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Ask Me About My Asian Fetish

Awhile back, Racialicious did a post on John and Kate Plus Eight and the Gosselins’ pathetic attempt to teach their children about their Korean heritage.  I say “pathetic” because this attempt apparently consisted of one dinner, which was largely hijacked by Kate “Honky-Ass” Gosselin.
I liked the article, but one of the comments got on my [...]

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Shelf Discovery

Lizzie Skurnick:  Shelf Discovery: The Teen Classics We Never Stopped Reading
So Skurnick and a handful of co-writers, including my own beloved Jennifer Weiner, wrote a book of brief essays about the YA novels they love.  Since the authors are all in their thirties or forties, these books generally date from the 60s, 70s, or the [...]

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A Standardized Life

So my mother and I have very little in common besides our senses of humor—we have just about opposite personalities, frankly—but we do share one strange quirk:  both of us have significant others who are CONVINCED that we are smarter than them.  In my mother’s case, I can kind of understand it.  My dad is [...]

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Jessica’s Guide to Dating on the Dark Side

Beth Fantaskey, Jessica’s Guide to Dating on the Dark Side
Jessica Packwood, the daughter of vegan, sustainable-farming professor parents, gets a right shock her senior year:   a “foreign exchange student” will be living in the apartment over her parents’ garage.  A foreign exchange student who’s a vampire.  A vampire who’s her vampire fiancé.
Jessica’s always known that [...]

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About Heather

Once upon a time, I had a problem with procrastination:  I distinctly remember faking sick when I was in middle school so that I could stay home and complete a project that was due the next day.  And when I say “complete,” what I really mean is “Brainstorm, write, and edit,” because I hadn’t even [...]

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The Bayou IS a Tribulation

My tribulations are just never-ending, y’all.  A few days ago, some folks got a good look at Oliver and were all, “We don’t mean to offend you, but your cat is…he’s really big.”
Guys, my cat is mother-fucking FAT.  You can say it, because it’s true.  I swear it will not hurt my feelings, or his.  [...]

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