The Things That Are Wrong with This Picture

The Boyfriend and I have been doing pretty well about buying most of our food from the farmer’s market, but there are just some things you cannot purchase out of the back of a truck.  Like potato chips. Well, I mean, unless the Lays’ guy is on the make.  But do you really want to get involved [...]

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Tease

I like to explain my relationship with my father to people who have never met him by telling them that he has only one emotion, and it is ANGER.  In fact, his reaction to everything is so ludicrous and over-the-top that although the following exchange has never actually happened, it very well might one day [...]

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TMI, TMI, TMI

We are about to talk about blood here, folks–blood that comes out of your vagina.  Excuse me, WAGINA.  So if that is the sort of thing that bothers you, I’d say you should probably quit reading right now. But if you are a woman would like to help shed some light on the mystery that [...]

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I Don’t Know If I Even Remember How To Write These Anymore

But I’ll give it my best shot. Mary Roach, Bonk An irreverent exploration of the scientific study of sex.  If you’re looking for a serious critique of medicine/scientific research, this is NOT IT, but Roach makes plenty of good-natured digs about the absurdity of what she’s writing about (grafting baboon balls onto human men?  REALLY?). 

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For Samantha

A few weeks ago, one of my coworkers came back to the office after recovering from surgery. Since this gentleman had A.) JUST HAD FRICKEN’ SURGERY, OMIGOD; and B.) makes it a point to not eat anything “white” (meaning no refined sugar), my boss asked me to find the most disgustingly healthy muffin recipe possible. [...]

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Sunday Afternoon Nap

Step One Lay down on the couch:

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Public Service Announcement

Observe this disgustingly idyllic scenery: Isn’t it gorgeous?  Almost makes you forgive Virginia for all the fucking humidity.  ALMOST. Anyway, this is where I go to procure my fresh, local, and hella expensive produce every weekend (seven dollars for three tomatoes WHAT?).  I’m very fond of it, not least because the Boyfriend used to live [...]

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I Am Just Falling Apart Here, People

I’d like to apologize for the fact that there’s been a distinct lack of book reviews up in this bitch.  Part of this stems from the fact that I am writing posts EVERY SINGLE DAY, OMIGOD, and I’m not going to lie—it’s pretty draining.  I don’t have a whole lot of emotional energy left over [...]

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Books and Movies That Warped Me for Life

I.  Born in Arizona/Moved to Babylonia I have a long-standing fascination with Egypt and mummies; my mother, understanding this, brought home a book about King Tut when I was in the ninth grade.  One night, I decided to read it over a dinner of a nice, hearty beef stew.  All was well, until I got [...]

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The Other Side of the Equation

Looking at Elisabeth Hasselbeck’s disturbingly tanned visage this morning, I was reminded once again of why I hate it when people ask me to “consider the other point of view” when it comes to social or political issues.  Meaning that I, the cracked-out liberal, should stop and really, deeply consider the socially conservative viewpoint. What [...]

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